Here are some more of my views on love based on my life stories:
As damaged as I feel I have been from my past emotional experiences with men, I still have hope and believe in love. Love doesn't always come easy, and it can change form at any moment. To me, love lessons feel the most epic. Sometimes events will deal you a major blow, a doozey, that blindsides you, and you are forced to adjust (like my high school-college sweetheart/fiance of 3.5 years dumping me out-of-the-blue on my 21st birthday. One minute you have a fiance and the next minute it's over.) Yeah, sometimes life is drastic to get you moving along to the next step.
Love can just happen, even with someone you never expect it to happen with. For example, with the high school sweetheart that I previously mentioned: we were on a team of 5 people for an 11th-grade history project, and we weren't even attracted to each other or seemed remotely interested in each other. He certainly wasn't the "type" that I usually am attracted to naturally. The night before the history project was due, he and I were the only ones available to complete it. We met at the public library, and somewhere during our research, the spark happened, and we ended up together for 3.5 years.
Love transcends all traits, which is why people of drastically different cultural and ethnic backgrounds can find themselves in love and desperate to make it work to be together. People have commented to me several times that the guys that I've dated "don't look like guys they thought I would date". I guess that is each person's own view, but I am open-minded about traits: it's about the connection, feelings, chemistry, gut feelings. I have been attracted to different men for different reasons and ended up in love (or not).
Love can hit anytime without warning: For anyone who has experienced that also, they'll probably agree that it is like Cupid shooting a love arrow into your heart without warning. My story of experiencing that is with the last boyfriend I had that I moved from Texas to California to join (but then broke it off shortly after moving here for various reasons). When I first met him, I was adamant I didn't want to date, and then somewhere during a 3 hour conversation I had with him, suddenly I had feelings for him. Like the feelings came out of no-where and I can't even pin-point what spurred it. I'd started the conversation saying "I don't want to date you", and after the conversation I felt like he was very important to me. (In hindsight, I believe his highest purpose in my life was to bring me to Los Angeles, the City of Angels, where I got my Angel calling on my second day in LA).
You can develop love feelings for someone before even meeting them. My life story for this lesson in love is I stumbled across my ex-husband's Myspace profile when Myspace was first becoming popular. He had a public link to a blog he kept, and I was bored at work on a graveyard shift, so I read through some of it. Feelings stirred inside pretty early on that he was "The One" before I'd even met him in person. We were together for 6.5 years, married for 4 of those years, and still good friends even after divorce. Sometimes two people may love each other, but may not stay on the same path or remain congruent with each other in a relationship, since people are in constant evolution, as is the relationship itself.
Each relationship is as unique as the print on your thumb. Love is a certain form of euphoria, and can be present in various forms with different people, animals, and objects. One example is if you're trying out dating multiple people while you're single, you may have feelings for or love each person differently, and have to decide which one feels the most "right" in your heart and gut. Another example is that a relationship between each parent will be unique with each child, and relationships between siblings will each be unique.
Love can feel like a drug, or a high, and be nearly impossible to turn off or turn down! (It's linked to the brain chemicals oxytocin and PEA!) But also, research has shown that the heart is hardwired to love. Did you know that pain from a broken heart registers in the same part of the brain as a broken arm? I learned that in my Psychology and Health class in college.
My diary entry from 4/29/13
I just had an epiphany. The reason that love makes us "crazy" or scrambles our marbles, is because the heart overrides the mind. The emotion frequency of love overpowers all. Love will make you do crazy things, or stay with people that hurt and abuse you, or take you for granted. Love, being the most positive strong emotional frequency, will do almost anything for the object of attention.
Love is the most powerful force and the strongest fuel.
Love comes from spirit, which is pure. Hate comes from a contaminated mind.
~Mandelyn Reese, The LA Street Angel
9/6/13 My friend posted this pic on Facebook, and I decided it should be added to this blog!!
My video on LOVE